Weekly Update #2
The week started off bad with a major fail in observing the Sabbath. You would think doing nothing for twenty-four hours would be relatively easy, especially since a good chunk of the morning was spent at church. Instead, I couldn’t sit still for more than a few minutes. I worked around the house, wrote for this blog, went to the grocery and, in general, treated the designated time of Sabbath just like any other day.
What does it say about my life that I can’t take one day a week and relax? There was nothing that had to be done, yet I felt like I needed to be constantly moving and accomplishing something. The rule “I can do anything as long as it accomplishes nothing” got thrown out the window almost immediately.
As I moved into the work days things were going much smoother than the week before. I was eating enough calories, drinking my wine every night, getting my exercise in, etc. But by Wednesday, just as I predicted, the novelty of the new diet had worn off. My withdrawal from the sugar addiction had set in pretty hard and I was in a foul mood.
Wednesday evening I stopped by the grocery to pick up a few things and as I rolled the shopping cart through the bakery section I glanced over and saw the doughnuts. I shivered a bit and the Pavlov effect kicked in as my mouth filled with saliva. I longed for boston cream, apple fritter and chocolate covered, cream filled goodness.
I paid for the groceries and drove home where I started chopping up the peppers for my veggie and bean quesadilla on whole wheat tortillas that I’d soon be eating without sour cream.
I began to curse everything and anything that had to do with this idiotic project I’d heaped on my own shoulders. I cursed Dan Buettner for giving his talk at TED that put this idea in my head. I cursed TED for inviting him to speak in the first place. I cursed myself. And I especially cursed all the vegetables I’ve been eating.
I just wanted a doughnut.
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While I would have been hard pressed to find anything good about this project around the middle of the week, some really exciting things have started happening as a result of this new lifestyle.
Thursday night after dinner Candace, Conner, Max and I crowded around the counter to make some whole wheat bread from scratch. Candace showed us how to do everything while Conner helped me put all the ingredients together. It was such a fulfilling time and it’s becoming a regular event around the house. It’s amazing what happens when the television is turned off, the computer is powered down and the phone is on silent. You’re stuck having to spend time enjoying each others company instead of being endlessly distracted by useless stuff.
The frequency at which I forget to do things is going down as well. One evening this week Candace asked me if I had remembered to do a few things that needed to be done that day. I had done them all. This is an extremely weird thing for me. I’m the epitome of the absent minded professor yet this past week I’ve followed through on almost everything that I needed to get done.
A big part of this project is that it forces me to slow down and actually consider what I’m doing. I can’t mindlessly stop at whatever fast food establishment is close by. I can’t skip meals anymore because I have to eat the right amount of food at every meal to maintain my calorie intake without eating past 80% full. I have to think about when I’m going to exercise, spend time with my family and drink my glass of wine.
This is an incredibly satisfying feeling. Instead of being constantly controlled and jerked about by my food cravings, work stresses and distractions, I’m now making choices at every part of the day that I’m proud of. The shame of shoving a bunch of donuts down my throat in the grocery parking lot is gone. I feel good about how much I’m exercising. I feel like a good husband and father with how much time I’m spending with my family. So many things I always wanted to be a part of my life are being forced into it by this striving to live in perfect health.
If you had asked me half way through the week, I would have said I was ready to abandon the whole thing for some artery-clogging pastries. But as I step back and take notice of all the ramifications this project is having on my life, I’m seeing so many more good things that are making it worth it.
Photo by: gypsygirl09
